On boredom

So it’s been a while, but I’m finally back on track… well sort of anyway. And while out of ideas about what to write, a friend suggested that I write about the mood that I’m currently in, which is sheer and utter boredom. Excellent, I thought.

What do we know about boredom? Essentially, for me, it’s an indescribable feeling and state of mind that renders one placid, flaccid and somewhat sluggish. The funny thing is that while in that state, you crave for something to slap you awake and make you active. But at the same time the mere thought of physical movement -i.e. getting off the couch, bed, or an inexplicably comfortable chair- seems like an impossible feat. I blame guilt. The enjoyment of doing absolutely nothing is so overwhelmingly blissful that it makes you hate yourself, and so the vicious circle begins again.

Another peculiarity pertaining to boredom is the fact that although you’re as inactive as one can be, times flies like a migrating bird that’s being chased by a dragon. Take me for example: if someone should ask me what I did today, I can honestly say …nothing, nada, niente! This statement becomes even scarier when you consider the fact that it’s now 8:29pm. The most annoying thing is how you wake up in the morning, religiously prepare your coffee and think to yourself, today I’m going to do this and that. And damn, does it feel good! But then something weird happens… the dial moves unreasonably fast and becomes a blur as you waste away surfing the Internet, literally stare at your fingernails, talk on the phone, or doodle on a piece of paper. And while you pretend to be thinking of what you’re going to do next, the day has passed you by. Poof! Gone!

I’ve often wondered what generates boredom, but I’m afraid I’ve yet to discover a probable cause. The most dangerous thing about it thought is that it can strike at any moment and is impervious to any kind of responsibility, that is, no matter how busy you truly are or how many things you need to take care of, when it hits you, it takes over and doesn’t let go. And before you smile and think to yourself “she’s being a bit too dramatic,” think instead of the last time you were bored out of your mind and whether you ‘neglected’ to do things that should have been done …I rest my case.

Yet another frustrating quality of boredom is that as an excuse it kind of sucks. If you’re sick, depressed, or simply feeling under the weather, another person’s reaction will be sympathetic, compassionate even. But try telling your boss that the ninja report isn’t ready because you felt lazy, and I think we can all agree on what his reply will sound like. I’m currently in my ninth year of studies, so I like to consider myself a connoisseur, if you will, of the fine and delicate art of pure laziness. In between the innumerable all-nighters, the horrors of impossible deadlines, the ever-present anxiety of exams, and the delicious yet deadly coffee-and-donuts binges, I have also fought, but seldom won, epic battles with my lovely arch enemy.

In the end, it’s a love/hate relationship which you must accept, embrace, and eventually learn to enjoy. For what is life without a little boredom?

2 thoughts on “On boredom

  1. Is there really such thing as boredom, or is it just the lack of will, of true motivation?
    It sure is an unhealthy state of mind.
    Really touching text though miss, i turn to believe you dont suffer of boredom after all!

    Like

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