On cinches

There are moments in your life when you are invaded by a strange clarity of mind. Sometimes it is scary, other times, like this one, it is almost funny. You are able to discern patters as they emerge; they are born out of a universe you did not reject but chose to try out, because it seemed preferable at the time. Tonight I went back to an old one, which is really a new one due to the fact approximately a year ago I had rejected it, disowned it, deemed it unnecessary. 

We create universes with every choice we make. Our thousand selves, as Hesse has defined them, alternate among them. Thus, the Steppenwolf is never bored, but forever hunting. Don’t be alarmed, he is inside all of us. It’s just that when you have never faced yours, it is terrifying to witness someone else’s. 

We have been told that our greatest fears are either loss, failure or rejection. They never tell you the truth. Your greatest fear is yourself; that other side of yours you keep ignoring in the hopes it will disappear, evaporate into thin air. You hope to scare yourself into non-existence. Try it, see what comes of it. You begin to see yourself into all that you are not as it is so much easier to pretend to be something else than who you truly want to be.

The truth is not always somewhere in the middle, sometimes it is on the other side of where we’re standing. They only way to reach it is to get our feet wet, to become uncomfortable. Sometimes, reaching the other side is only one choice away; but one that we have to keep making, every second of every day. Nobody has time for that, for we are consumed with making the wrong ones. The familiar ones. 

The easiest mistakes are the ones we’ve made before. 

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